22-02-2021, 12:18 PM
So I'm a guy and I have a female roommate.
Its complicated.
We've been roommates for a few months and we're still working the adapting to each other's lifestyle. Sometimes, I'll leave the door when I'm using the hallway bathroom. Sometimes, she'll forget to take the trash out. We're pretty good about having those conversations but the one thing that has been off-topic is the issues with our approach to having company stay over.
The layout of our flat is pretty funky -- both of our bedrooms are down at the end of the hall and literally our beds are next to each other, only separated by a wall. Since I've been "busy with work" I haven't had people over but she's been farming swipes on Tinder. Players going to play.
But I don't know if she realizes I can hear her. We both know what is going down when someone walks into the apartment at 11 PM on a Friday but I'm pretty sure she thinks that she's super quiet.
She's not.
But the worst part is that she sounds like Fran Drescher's character in The Nanny when moaning.
At first, I thought she was just playing it up one night because she was having to fake it through. But night after night, I swear I was hearing the flashy girl from Flushing in the room next to me.
I held onto this information for sometime until we got into an argument over what type of dish soap to use -- I'm not even kidding -- and have been on thin ice since..
She's been seeing the same guy for a few weeks now and I began the habit for every time she was getting hot and heavy, to play "The Nanny" theme song and have the speaker be incredibly close to the wall out of spite. First night, it was me just laughing about it while playing it quietly. But over the nights, I began to turn up the volume.
Which leads us to last night.
I wasn't doing too hot when it comes to my day-to-day operations and really was hoping they wouldn't be together that night. They were. Good for them.
This time, I couldn't hold it in and put the speaker on full volume -- so much so that I found out my neighbor above texted me about it saying, "Why the fuck are you watching The Nanny at 10:30 on a Friday."
As the theme song plays out, I hear audible male laughter. Slowly, I turn down the volume to hear a part of the conversation.
[i]"I just realized why he is playing it."[/i]
[i]"He's just watching the Nanny."[/i] - Shoutout to my roommate for thinking this. Its a great sitcom.
*"Don't get mad at me, you kind of sound like Fran Drescher when we're fucking."
Spoiler alert, she got mad. After a solid few minutes of yelling, she kicks him out of the bedroom and I have yet to speak to either of them since. In an attempt to fake things out, I locked the door and fell asleep to The Nanny playing on my laptopt -- to make it think I didn't intentionally play the song. I have since vacated the premises and stayed somewhere else to avoid the potential backlash but I do know I have some apologizing to do.
TL;DR Roommate and I were having a house beef. I played The Nanny Theme Song because she sounded like Franny Fine. Her boy toy laughed. Probably caused their argument. Now in hiding until the dust settles.
Its complicated.
We've been roommates for a few months and we're still working the adapting to each other's lifestyle. Sometimes, I'll leave the door when I'm using the hallway bathroom. Sometimes, she'll forget to take the trash out. We're pretty good about having those conversations but the one thing that has been off-topic is the issues with our approach to having company stay over.
The layout of our flat is pretty funky -- both of our bedrooms are down at the end of the hall and literally our beds are next to each other, only separated by a wall. Since I've been "busy with work" I haven't had people over but she's been farming swipes on Tinder. Players going to play.
But I don't know if she realizes I can hear her. We both know what is going down when someone walks into the apartment at 11 PM on a Friday but I'm pretty sure she thinks that she's super quiet.
She's not.
But the worst part is that she sounds like Fran Drescher's character in The Nanny when moaning.
At first, I thought she was just playing it up one night because she was having to fake it through. But night after night, I swear I was hearing the flashy girl from Flushing in the room next to me.
I held onto this information for sometime until we got into an argument over what type of dish soap to use -- I'm not even kidding -- and have been on thin ice since..
She's been seeing the same guy for a few weeks now and I began the habit for every time she was getting hot and heavy, to play "The Nanny" theme song and have the speaker be incredibly close to the wall out of spite. First night, it was me just laughing about it while playing it quietly. But over the nights, I began to turn up the volume.
Which leads us to last night.
I wasn't doing too hot when it comes to my day-to-day operations and really was hoping they wouldn't be together that night. They were. Good for them.
This time, I couldn't hold it in and put the speaker on full volume -- so much so that I found out my neighbor above texted me about it saying, "Why the fuck are you watching The Nanny at 10:30 on a Friday."
As the theme song plays out, I hear audible male laughter. Slowly, I turn down the volume to hear a part of the conversation.
[i]"I just realized why he is playing it."[/i]
[i]"He's just watching the Nanny."[/i] - Shoutout to my roommate for thinking this. Its a great sitcom.
*"Don't get mad at me, you kind of sound like Fran Drescher when we're fucking."
Spoiler alert, she got mad. After a solid few minutes of yelling, she kicks him out of the bedroom and I have yet to speak to either of them since. In an attempt to fake things out, I locked the door and fell asleep to The Nanny playing on my laptopt -- to make it think I didn't intentionally play the song. I have since vacated the premises and stayed somewhere else to avoid the potential backlash but I do know I have some apologizing to do.
TL;DR Roommate and I were having a house beef. I played The Nanny Theme Song because she sounded like Franny Fine. Her boy toy laughed. Probably caused their argument. Now in hiding until the dust settles.
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