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Would you Date someone with a terminal illness
#1
My friend was diagnosed with terminal cancer a few months ago. she is not doing chemo as she wants her last few months to be lived to the fullest and not stuck in hospitals.

We were talking last night and she told me that when she has been on dates as soon as she tells the guy things get awkward (which she understands, its a big thing) but then they ghost her. all she wants is to spend a few months with someone close.

Is she selfish to want to take a guys time only to die when he may develop feelings?

Could you date someone and develop feelings knowing there is an almost exact expirey date on the relationship?



#2
I think so, if I'm the their ability to leave some part of them in any way like a child (if that's even possible)
If I was a woman and met a cute guy with a terminal illness, I would really like to have his child as a memory of him
Or if the woman with the terminal illness has the possibility to have a child, then sure I would have him/her



#3
I get that, and the child is a way to carry the memory on.



#4
I could date them, but I probably wouldn't develop feelings. So as long as she's fine knowing that, then I would say sure. I've dated a girl short term before. She was moving out of state for school. Long distance wasn't our thing and we both knew prior hand, but decided to just go through with it to the end. It was just for the fun of it. So I wouldn't see it too differently from that if I were to date a terminally ill person I guess.



[+] 1 user Likes ceratsiv's post
#5
Kinda feel bad, but proably not



#6
I would just so they can pass with fond memories Smile



#7
Yeah I would, but like all good things I know that it'll end one day. The thing with this relationship is that I know it'll end sooner than most. It would be a relationship where you I would come in with an understanding that one day she would be gone and it'll hurt. Having said that, anybody can die at any time, so being in a relationship with someone who isn't ill doesn't mean that the relationship will last long or that your partner will live a long time. Life is full of surprises, good and bad.



#8
Tough question. I think the better question is, are you called/supposed to date that person for the last period of their life? Not very many people could handle dating in such a situation. Really, I think only a few can, and only a couple of those few would be strong enough to do so. Of them, only one of them would be called to date them. We humans (except for hermits usually) thrive on companionship from other humans, be it platonically or romantically.

I'd say there is someone out there that's supposed to date your friend, and has the full capacity to do so, even despite their terminal illness, and would be there til the end. Your friend doesn't need to date someone, she needs that one specific person to show up.



#9
I think that I would date her if its a match. After spending I year in Home office and quarantine I had more then enough time to think about this and would wish to make her and me as happy as possible, even if its just a limited time. Why not have a perfect year than nothing great over 5 years?



#10
I don't she's selfish at all, she just wants to live life to the fullest, personally i'd be very destroyed after their death so i'd no.



#11
sure if i love