Alrighty boiz (from a hetero perspective), I've used Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and OkCupid as my main stays for when I was on dating apps. In terms of volume of people Tinder and Bumble. OkCupid is a bit more connection based, but may have less active users. Hinge I heard was good and I liked it too, but things never seem to hit off. If you want to bank on your rapid matching skill and attractiveness Tinder and Bumble. More of a conversational based person, OkCupid and Hinge.
Before getting into this ALWAYS remember, never tie your self worth into how well you think you're doing in dating apps. I promise you it can brew some resent and insecurity (for me at least) so pull out and take a break from it if you find yourself obsessing over it. Note that people might have not even deleted their profile or set the option to have their profile not show up in the queue. If they don't respond I usually chalk it up to that if I feel they're inactive. Also know that with dating apps, you might come into the idea that you'll find your "perfect" match or some other idea that you might conjure up. While it's possible, don't go chasing perfection but more so compatibility. Chasing that "perfect match" is like trying to travel at the speed of light, it's really hard to do and may be impossible.
Now onto the approach from what I can remember, I did my best to not be ashamed of who I was. Honesty can go a long way along with making your intentions known! "Be yourself" may seem like a band-aid on an open wound, but it's the truth. The person you want SHOULD be into you! Though also remember people have different ways of portraying love (i.e. their love language, I suggest you take the quiz!) along with any trauma and mental health issues they may be dealing with (which could manifest in their behavior towards you).
For reference, I like having a nice picture of my face, then a body picture with some nice style (if you don't know what style you have or want, think about your "ideal" self and feel what would you wear to make yourself feel that way). I would write on what I'm looking for and maybe some cues to my personality. You're essentially selling yourself on dating apps, but don't sell yourself short! It's not your fault society want people to be a certain way. You have the full ability to bring out that "ideal" version of yourself.
Aside from the match stage, the talk stage is important (obviously lol). Sometimes people act "detached" besides maybe they're putting on a front or aren't as invested as you might me. While "matching their energy" is okay, but it can dim your own personality as you text. Open-ended questions are good (unfortunately I don't have much in mind rn, but usually on lofty topics like aspirations). Be respectful and make the feel of the conversation light! Make yourself have fun! If they don't give rapport well, sucks to be them if they matched and don't want to talk to you.
Still remember, always know your self worth, these people out their can be damaged, may only be seeking external validation, or could genuinely be finding a connection. I believe in you and I wish you the best!! Hope my (wordy) post helps!
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