How do you know how fine those couples are really? They might say that they are, but certain fetish relationships can have deep subconscious psychological impacts. One could make the argument that a cuckold relationship goes against the very biological basis of what a women is attracted to, and that (even if they are not consciously aware of it) it could in the long term lead to the woman losing her attraction and respect for the man.
Also I think it is a bit naive to just blankly assume there is nothing wrong with a fantasy. A fantasy can involve 'fetish' situations (like in the example of a cuckold fantasy), which are per definition a deviation from the normal 'healthy' sexual norm. The deeper you get into a fetish/fantasy, the more it draws you away from being capable of getting aroused from what is naturally supposed to arouse you (vanilla stuff). You are, in some sense, quite literally ruining your 'sexual mental health'. Now sure, one could argue that you can control a fantasy and not go so deep into that that it starts to strongly impact your life.., and yes, I guess that could be true. But still, you could make the same argument about occasional cocaine use. Both drugs and fetishes are in essence a 'bad' thing.
[/quote]
I think you're making a bad analogy here. Drug use and fetishes are not the same thing, and they don't work the same way. Having a fetish does not detract from finding vanilla sex fulfilling, nor are fetishes a mental health problem... and I'm speaking as a mental health professional here.
I also think you have a misunderstanding of attraction. You are not biologically wired to find a certain type of person attractive (I am not bringing sexual orientation into this), but I'm sure you have your own preferences: be it race, hair color, tit/ass size, etc... Do you consider that a fetish? And your fantasy is generally based on what you're attracted too, not the other way around. There's also no evidence that people are meant to be monogamous, that's the cultural norm, but look back in history and you'll find plenty of examples where it's not.
[/quote]
We ARE very much biologically wired to find a certain type of person attractive. The scientific consensus is more than clear on this. Of course there is such a thing as personal and cultural preferences, but those are always within a sane range of the biological standard. You can cherry pick certain outliers but those don't disproof the fact that there is a biological standard. For example, a certain ancient culture might have 'worshipped' a fat person statue, but that doesn't prove anything about them actually finding that body type physically attractive. It could very well be that they just associated being fat with wealth and that in that primitive culture wealth was a much stronger priority than pure physical attraction.
About the monogamy part, sure, we probably aren't meant to be monogamous, but that doesn't disprove anything about my point. If anything, I'd say it emphasizes the danger of what I'm trying to highlight. Human females naturally had a hypergamous mating strategy, where they would leave 'their' male the moment a better, stronger, more dominant one came along. By letting your wife have sex with other men, this could (hypothetically) trigger her primitive instincts (on a subconscious level) to lose her respect for you and start thinking about being with the 'better man'.
As far as I see it and how I like to use the word "fetish"... Personal and cultural preferences are generally within the biological range of attraction. And it is exactly when it start to fall out of the range, that we label it a fetish. And so following that definition (which is how it is often used in practice), a fetish is indeed a deviation from the normal, health sexual norm. And giving it to it will indeed 'damage' your sexual mental health.
[/quote]
In your opening post, you said you wanted to get a discussion going and get some opinions. Then you go to great lengths to rubbish other people's opinions. I won't be commenting any further in this thread.
![[+]](https://leakedbb.com/images/collapse_collapsed.png)
